No One Knows How to deal with Basic Mental Health Issues
I love when someone asks me if I am okay and then when I say no - they do or say nothing. Everyone has always seemed to do this to me, especially my sister who ironically has a degree in Psychology. To me not only is it not helpful - because you’re not offering any aid - it’s almost like you’re trying to shame me. You’re saying stop acting the way your acting . I don’t like it. I’m pointing out that you’re not okay. Get okay. I think some people ask me to try to embarrass me. It’s stupid because that type of shaming has never worked on me. I find it to be cruel because if you can imagine seeing someone down or at their worst emotionally and you are trying to kick them with your words. It’s sickening really. Saying passive aggressive statements about how I’m crazy and need therapy is also cruel, unnecessary and worthless unless you are actually attempting to get someone a therapist. That pisses me off so much. I don’t give a fuck that me not being okay is getting on your nerves or it’s overwhelming to you. Fuck off. Imagine how I feel then. (Because I am mostly minding my own business 95% of the time when I’m having a meltdown.)
Also, letting me say what’s wrong and then literally stonewalling me and not responding seems pretty rude and signaling that YOU the listener has some sort of personality disorder. It’s almost like again they simply asks to warn you that your feelings are unacceptable. When you share your feelings because you thought it was a genuine concern, they simply do not know how to respond because they really don’t care. You are once again inconveniencing them - bothering them with your emotions.
If you’re going to point out that I’m not doing well and offer me no help or even kind words - then you’re being passive aggressive. I will definitely not be okay magically for you. It’s not possible and even if I could just magically be okay then I would for myself and no one else.
It’s trying to “ check me “ and get me to fall in line. I’m not going to say that I’m okay if I’m not. Maybe that’s why women always just say “yeah I’m okay “ because nobody is going to do anything anyways. You just keep asking with no solutions. In fact you already know the answer so why ask. Merely asking my emotional status is not providing help, care or support. It’s the ultimate bare minimum and mostly so disturbing it’s like a slap in the face at this point.
I feel like we all need basic training on dealing with minor mental health crises. How to spot them and what to do. Obviously if someone is having a major crisis they should be taken to the doctor or hospital.
But I will repeat. Don’t ask me if I’m okay if you’re not going to do a thing about it. I’m well aware of my state. I don’t need a worthless commentary track. Asking me if I’m okay is not being supportive. It’s almost emotional abusive and definitely emotionally unintelligent. Merely asking if I’m okay is not proof of love. If you have no emotional tools - don’t ask me if I’m okay. Because I’m just going to say no and you’re just going to stand there and now you’re adding rage into my already difficult day.
Nombre trente-neuf / # 39
